Angelina Pelova (AKA Angie K)

Bloggers Need Thick Skin

I published my 100th post yesterday. Well done, I thought to myself, tap on the back. So I headed over to my blog’s Facebook page to share the WordPress badge with my followers:

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Minutes later, someone commented: “Fake”.

My first reaction was: huh, wtf? Why would anyone even think this? And, a bit surprisingly to myself, I was actually hurt.

So, why indeed?

Is this human nature nowadays, to suspect something bad or fake everywhere?? To expect that people always have a hidden agenda? Perhaps WordPress bloggers live in a cocoon, in this community of like-minded writers supporting each other with no agenda – just to help each other grow? Unlike the “real” world where people always look for something to criticise or find faults with?

So, here was my wake up call: if I want to establish some sort of online presence, it is imperative to develop a thick skin. As soon as possible.

I can think of one great example for this, if not the best: power blogger OM. I’ve always admired him for freely speaking his mind and not being afraid to challenge. But how on earth do you do this??

Not that at I am afraid of criticism, but constructive criticism is one thing (even if harsh), while blunt unprovoked offence is something different. It will take time to get used to.

Now, sharing my badge on WordPress rather than Facebook, I know that people here will appreciate its value. I am well aware that I am not the most productive blogger, and perhaps this is why I am a tad proud. Another milestone under my belt. And thank you to all those who read my posts and engaged in them!

And oh, promoting the blog on Facebook is not all bad, after all. Yesterday I also got a lovely message from a tall lady who follows my posts through the Facebook page. She said some really nice things about the blog and asked for fashion advice. So, there: on the day when my blog received its first insult, it also received its first reader’s request!

Now, let’s do some research and help my reader.

115 comments

  4. it’s living in a world full of adversity,when you stand on your soap.box and shout here I am,there will always be someone else to say,hey what about me. It’s not you my friend it’s life,you are just making a statement of your accomplishments,the rest of those poor slobs need to get a life,which they can not find because their to busy looking for someone to inflict their misery on,their agenda is unhappiness,yours was a statement of accomplishment.
    As always Sheldon

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  6. I published my 100th post last week too – and didn’t even realize it until after it went live. Glad you are still going! Someone wise told me if everyone agrees with you, you missing out on expressing yourself. Sometimes you need to ruffle a few feathers. Stand for what you believe in – your tribe will follow you 🙂

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  10. Ah yes, being on the internet is like a peek into the human psyche. It’s not always so pretty. People are far more distrustful these days so those accusations of “fake” are not uncommon. Indeed, you need a thick skin. If people aren’t happy for you, they probably aren’t happy with their own selves either.

    So, congratulations on the blogging journey and I wish you great success!

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  11. None of my Facebook followers, not to mention none of my biological family, respond to anything I do in writing. Next book: memoir! (That was only partly a joke). You write for yourself or you don’t write at all.

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  15. Congratulations on your 100th post! Haters are people who try to build themselves up by tearing others down. The only feeling you should spare for them (if any at all) is empathy – keep doing what you’re doing!

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  17. Ah, I feel your momentary frustration. I linked my posts to my FB then stopped when little to none of my friends would take four minutes to read it. Jeez…these are people that say they are my friends. I have toughened up, relinked it, and spend more time learning about my WordPress family! Putting it out there and not worrying so much anymore feels good!

    More importantly, CONGRATULATIONS !! Woohoo – a hundred posts is awesome!

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  19. Congrats on your 100th post. It’s quite an achievement. Don’t bother with the nonentity and his two-bit opinions but I understand what you mean about it being hurtful. I had a similar experience last month and I can’t pretend I wasn’t stung but you realise that the people who make these comments are the sad cases – not you.

    Great blog by the way. I look forward to checking out more posts 🙂

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  20. Congrats!!! I’ve found that I don’t really want to share my posts on FB. I have put my blog address on my page and those who want to follow me can. I find bloggers are better judges of what I write. FB to me is to keep up with friends and family and to give a quick rant or praise or when I do something stupid like drive past my job that I have been going to for 2 years. LOL

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    • Thanks for commenting. I do actually usr FB for my blog a lot, but there are some consequences of this. If you are curious, check out my posts about security on FB and fashion scam. 🙂

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  22. Congratulations. 100 posts – that’s a lot of posts. I don’t get why people say the things they do. I guess before the internet, we only had to deal with the angry, jealous people in our immediate vicinity. Now there is a whole world of angry, jealous, insecure people that feel like they can say whatever they want because of the anonymity the internet provides. You know what they are – cowards. Who needs them?

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  25. Lol, and you don’t even write about real issues, dude is just personally hating on you or was having a moment of cheekiness. If it’s the former, that’s just jealousy, just like high school. The latter, hmmm. What is your mindset? Grow up is all i have to say. #DontTakeItPersonal (the 4 agreements.). No matter the intention of the person, it worked negatively within you — what they did for reasons you are assuming yet don’t know actually are real. Such will continue to work until you fix that trigger button in you. That’s blogging.

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    • Yup, true. She had added me briefly on FB for some reason, then unfriended me quickly once she realised how tall I was. Apparently, she was in shock. Now that’s what I call a valid reason, hey!!

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  26. Strange reaction…. but if you put yourself out there you are always going to find a crazy person…. just feel sorry for them and move on!

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  32. Angie, congratulations on an amazing milestone. Facebook is not the great-all for feedback on posts. Your blogging community is! You are one blogger friend I always follow. You can get more from dedicated followers than a few passing likes and dumb comments from FB fanatics. Look at what you see on FB, makes you wonder sometimes! Christine

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  33. Well done on achieving your first 100! May there be many, many more… as for the haters, shake it off. I have had one as well, can you believe? Still, the nastiness can take your breath away. Delete and block. It is the only way. 🙂 Mother Hen… (Not tall, but an appreciative reader for sure!)

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  36. Wow. Yeah, I had a few jerks say some things to me… in person, after I offhandedly said I was going to write a blog entry later that night. We were eating out, and they asked, “Why aren’t you taking out your phone to take a picture of your meal to put on your blog? Shouldn’t that attract all the foodies?” I don’t think they were being sarcastic, because they followed it up with, “You’re not seriously putting that on your resume, are you?”

    What? No! This is a hobby and honestly, a chance to connect with other people who lead different lives than I do!

    It helps to just ignore it. It’s not worth it to let people like that upset you. What you said about the nice Facebook message… things like that only prompt me to re-read all my nice comments, especially on bad days (my day job actually involves dealing with unpleasant people who say utterly horrible things when they don’t even know you).

    When you think about it, just acting on a thought you want to share isn’t so common, I think. No shame in blogging and being happy that you stuck through with something.

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  37. Some people will always try to bring you down. Congratulations on your 100th post! Curiously, I just posted my 100th post too which was slightly surprising to me, I thought I was far from that number.

    As a short woman who has tiny feet, I still find your blog interesting because it explores issues that I had personally never thought about. So I’d like to give you a high five and a big hug for doing this. Keep up the good work. 🙂

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  39. 100!!! wow…that’s so cool!!! so have a big heaping scoop of ice cream(if that’s allowable in your realm)…and hug your best friend too…milestones give us purpose and reason to move and not become blobs

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  40. When the trolls come to your blog think about how pathetic and banal their offline life is. Then take 2 deep breaths and tell your self “not my monkeys not my circus ” and smile

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  42. I remember when I posted my 100th post, what I can’t remember is whether I posted about it on Facebook or not. I’ve been pretty lucky so far, I haven’t had any haters, unless of course you count OM lol. Anyway, congratulations on passin’ 100, I’m lookin’ forward to many more from you!

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  44. Congratulations!! 100 is no small feat so you have every right to be proud. As for the naysayers, they’re real bold behind a screen on the keyboard! Celebrate your accomplishment, bask in the good words and feedback!!

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  49. Unfortunately we now live in an era where people hide behind the internet and feel invinsible and go around spewing hate on other. I freely admit on being harsh sometimes, but there’s a line I don’t cross. I’ve seen people getting rape/death wishes for nothing and it’s vile and disgusting; good for you for celebrating 100 posts, the ones calling ‘fake’ will always doubt you and even if you give them proof, they will call it a lie.

    Just remember that there are people out there who will be happy for you and help you celebrate your accomplishments. Those are the ones that matter.

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